So here. we. go.
As promised, the full results and rules of the Justin Bieber Never Say Never drinking game. How did this come about, you may ask? Well it’s just the simple combination of good friends, a small amount of alcohol and a terrible selection on Netflix instant queue.
Eventually, once you go through categories like “movies featuring a strong female lead” (not my Netflix, don’t ask), you get desperate and a little buzzed. Then one of your friends says, “DUDE DRINKING JUSTIN BIEBER” and you can’t really say no because….okay well I probably should have said no. Anyways, I digress. Here are the rules we made up (and a few I made up just now):
Rule 1: Drink every time he puts a hat/hood on or off.
This one was a little disappointing, only because it just shows him with a hood or hat on all the time. It’s like he sleeps in hoods or hats at all times to protect the hair, and he only takes them off to shower or something. (which they obviously couldn’t show…it would have made way too much money on the secondary market.)
Rule 2: Every time you see a crying girl, drink. Every time you see a crying mom, drink twice.
This one lived up to all expectations. Wow. This mom said she went to Michael Jackson’s Thriller for her first concert….but she cried at the sight of the Biebs. Yeah.
Rule 3: After you see a dad looking miserable in the crowd, the last person to make up a back-story to why he’s there has to drink.
My favorite? “He totally just got divorced and is living in a terrible apartment alone, and he’s trying to buy back his daughters’ affection.”
Rule 4: Every time someone in his entourage looks like he’s just there because he’s taking advantage of the Biebs’s money, the last person to go out and rent Home Alone, or another Macaulay Culkin movie, drink.
Aka drink every time his formerly dead beat dad is in the frame. I may or may not have just made this rule up.
Rule 5: Anytime Usher talks about how tight they are, or how they “went back to ATL to record”, drink.
Not the ATL, just ATL. I mean…yeah, he does this a lot.
Sidenote: when was the last time Usher was actually relevant? I’m going to say right before people allowed him to make In the Mix. Who knew he peaked with Confessions?
Rule 6: The hair. Anytime it’s touched or mentioned, drink.
Holy drinking. This scene made the entire game worth our time.
So yeah….that happened. If you’re ever bored with some friends I don’t recommend you do this. But at least it’s an option.